Surviving

Photo by Thom Rouse: Hat by Felt Happiness

I believe I have said it before, unless you have another income, ( like from a spouse or parent) it is almost impossible to support yourself solely as a model.  Some folks expand into promo modeling, or art modeling ( as I have done) but still,it's very hard.  Most models have at the very least part time jobs ( and the bulk, full time)  as waitresses, or retail clerks, admin assistants, dental hygienists....you name it, somebody is doing it,I am sure.

Why do I bring this up?

Two reasons.

One: Face the facts...you are not going to become rich and famous ( well maybe, a little  famous) but not very rich doing this.....unless you are the 1 tenth of 1 percent, that becomes the next runway , print and merchandising darling- it won't happen.  There are MILLIONS of beautiful people trying to "make it big" and most will not...that is just the odds out there.

Two: After 3 years of trying to make a go solely from the modeling, I just can't anymore....I have debts to pay, I have a kid going into high school,I have home repairs and frankly, things I would like to do....that takes more money than I am making.  Don't get me wrong... I LOVE what I do, but I am going to have to fit it around a closer to full time gig.

I have two interviews set up in the next two weeks...both retail...which allows a flexible schedule, so I can schedule around kid,husband, other gigs....but I won't be able to take last minute things anymore....unless I happen to have that day off...my schedule will become much more unbending.

Hopefully, it will only be for a couple years,and I can get back to doing what I love solely.... but something must be done....got bills to pay, and so many folks out there give themselves away for free, because it's just something fun for them...not something they are trying to make a living at.

I will continue to learn, and practice, and hone my posing, and styling and angles...and yes, you will still see me....but circumstances being what they are...a girl has gotta eat, and pay bills.

Why so Serious?

Photo by: Micheal Barton

Indeed.... Why so serious?  Most of my shoots, for whatever reason have a more serious tone ( not to say that we don't have fun, because we do, but the images that come out are more sultry, or serious or sexy  or demure...you get the idea)

I had a shoot yesterday with D&G Studios that was none of that...not really... It was silly. I pulled silly, over the top faces, did silly things , wore silly costumes....( no not clowns- though you will see soon) it was just light hearted all the way around.  It was great!  It was good to just let my self relax and inject more humor into the images them selves ( I inject humor into everything else, why not some shoots?)

This isn't to say that I didn't prepare for the shoot, I did, as usual collect and prepare for it as far as costuming and makeup/ hair were concerned ( first time with liquid liner...I think I did pretty well)   And we knocked out 5 looks in about 2 and a half hours, so we were flying and got about 160 images to sort through.  So "silly" does not mean "not prepared"

I really am quite excited to see the results done ( I have all ready seen the proofs ) It's a really fun set.  ( Think vintage pin-up, along with modern comic pin-up...but remember the silly)
 

Another Birthday

Photo by Michael Barton Art 

Well, another birthday is here. ( for the record I am 42... and found out I share a birthday with Paul Sr. of Orange County Choppers lol)

There are many people (  women AND men) that birthdays are scary, or depressing.  Why? because you are a year older? that IS a reason to celebrate! you are a year older! You made it!  Another birthday is certainly better than the alternative!

My hubby made me a wonderful, touching,nerdy card. ( Zazzle.com, you can make your own cards...how cool is that? )
"You are my 42"  " My ultimate answer to life, the universe and everything"  How cool is that? I love him...for reasons like this and so many more !


I have found that so far, my 40's are the best time of my life... I am working at doing something I love ( totally unexpectedly) I feel more secure in myself,my relationship with my husband, with other people. I feel as though I am more fully "myself " than I ever have been.  Not such a bad thing, now is it?

Age is just a number...not a definition. Define YOURSELF.

What did Auntie Mame say? " Life's  a banquet, and most poor suckers are starving to death!"   Eat life up! Go where it takes you! LIVE ,  LOVE and never, ever stop Laughing!

Goals

Photo by: Michael Barton Art

It is good to have goals... in life,in business, in anything you do. It gives you that next level to reach for, the next step to take the next direction you need to push for.  I ,for the past 10 months,have kind of been treading water.  Mostly because of the unfinished state of my tattoo. I haven't been PUSHING. I have been doing shoots as they come up, and not really searching for them. I have been doing lots of Art Modeling,because then it is the purely up to the artist at hand if the tattoos are to even be included in the piece. ( not to mention that it is paid)
 
As I look at the tattoo being done in a couple weeks,what ARE my goals for this year? What is my next step.  ( and some of these I have touched on before,but here, I clarify them in my own mind)

1. To be in a print magazine,that can be found in a bookstore or newsstand.  ( or even more than one) A Tattoo magazine, a photography magazine.  Something that anyone could just buy, or subscribe to and have it come in the mail)

2. To be in one of the amazing online magazines, like Dark Beauty, or Giuseppina Magazine that focuses on amazing art photography.

3.To get a cover, of any magazine.  ( I know better than to be picky)

4. To work on more collaborations with clothes designers, accessory designers. I will be working with the amazing Econica very soon, but I want to do more

5.  More paid bookings.  ( MORE is such a nebulous word, what does it mean...for me,MORE is at least one paid shoot a month, every month...maybe even 2) This is, after all how I pay for groceries.  I LOVE TFP type shoots, mostly because it seems that there is more give and take between the photographer and myself, there is more of a willingness to just see where things go. BUT running with what is needed for a specific use, or the photographers vision, or a companies vision, that is good as well.  I need more bookings.

6. Stretch more, explore more,do more that I have not tried before.  Things like underwater photography, wind / motion/ fabric photography, Extreme make up/ body paint photography. Editorial photography, couture photography.... the list goes on of things that I want to try, things I want to do.

Realistically, will  all of this happen this year? Probably not, but if they don't, they roll over to next year, and if they do... well then ,I have to set higher goals for myself !  

  

Can you hack it?

Photo by: Michael Barton Art

I was reminded again that you need to have thick skin and not take things personally in this business of modeling.  You WILL get ignored, rejected, and sometimes even spoken down to, ( because of course, a model couldn't POSSIBLY have a brain)  or bluntly told that your "look" or your size, or your whatever, is not what is being looked for.  You will get reasons from age, to height to tattoos ( too many, not enough, not in the right spots)  Picture quality, style, retouching..... all of it. There will always be a myriad of reasons for you or your work  being rejected.  Or they will just not bother to respond at all .  Many will let this get to them, let it drag on them, and let it become some sort of editorial about their "worthiness" to be a model, or for some, even more sadly , even to exist.

You simply CAN NOT let it get to you.  You can make the choice either to keep going, or to give up if you can't handle it....but don't keep on doing it ,if it is going to contribute to  you being  miserable.... nothing is worth that. Trust me.

And trust me as well... it doesn't matter how thin, how tall, how big your boobs are or aren't, what styles you work in or don't work in...It WILL happen ...on more than one occasion, most likely fairly frequently.  I bet even Kate Moss or Cindy Crawford has ad campaigns tell them on occasion, that they aren't what  is being looked for.  This is part of the life.... if it isn't something that you can let just roll off your back, then this isn't something you will cope with well.

People  think about, and imagine the glamour  ( really,not so much,unless you count getting to play dress up- which is fun, no doubt) Sometimes call times are unpleasantly early, or late, or during evenings or weekends.  You have to network, network, network. You WILL be exhausted after a long shoot, trust me.  It can be too cold, to hot, wet, messy, dirty and just plain uncomfortable. BUT, you also have a chance to meet WONDERFUL people as Make up artists, designers, photographers ,magazine staffers, other models. Sometimes you get to do things that you would not normally get to ( sit in a vintage plane for example, or get to actually touch a wolf) Sometimes you get to travel.

What I am saying is this... you have to be willing and able to roll with the punches,keep going even with rejection,and keep a good attitude, and retain the ability to laugh the entire time....

This is a big part of being a model... it isn't just standing there a looking pretty. Your internal emotional landscape has to be able to cope as well.

   

Publication and Making it

                          Photo by: Michael Jones Sootie's Doll Photography

Many models have a goal... to "make it" but what does that mean?  Undoubtedly for many, Publication.  In a book, in a magazine, ads, bill boards. I am no exception, though my version of "making it" might be slightly different than some models.

I will never be a runway model ( with the slight possibility of being a"gimmick" in some show....you know the ones that use older people in mohawks, or people that are real sized.  Every year, some designer mixes these types  into the mix of the more typical runway fare. But then, the "gimmicks" are really never seen again)
I am too short, not thin enough , not young enough, and I am fine with that.

But my goal is still publication.
And I have been, over 13 times, in the last year- year and a half.  All of them small, web based magazines ( which means you can get them as a solely digital copy or order a printed copy, which is printed up and  bound per order...one at a time.  Usually though portals such as MagCloud)
I am also in an online catalog for a   clothing rental and sales business targeted to models  called The Clothed Image      and I will soon be online for a company called ECONICA ( so far just on Etsy, but she will be launching a stand alone website soon)  BUT..

But does that mean I have "made it" ? Not in my own eyes.  Not one of the publications paid, or the catalog work. ( aside from barter...which is awesome too, I have zero complaints) So what does "making it" mean to me?

Paid work,weather it be being paid by the photographer, or by the business that pictures are being taken for.  Publication in a magazine that one could get at a newsstand.  Work for more catalogs . So what am I saying? More steady paid work.  So goals for this year:
1. Publication in print ( I have done sort of...more on that later-though I will work on a magazine as soon as my tattoo is done)
2. Representation of more clothing and accessory lines .
3. Continuing to be in web based magazines, and web based sites for exposure.
4. Continuing entering contests, not necessarily to win ( though that would be nice) but for the exposure.

 I DO have agency representation ( which for some people, never happens...not with a real life, brick and mortar agency) But as wonderful and nice as they are , over at Kingdom Model Talent Agency I do not leave my working solely in their hands.  I submit sets to magazines, web sites, I check the sites for gigs, almost every day. Lots and lots of e-mails....and network, network, network.

Sometimes things fall into place, sometimes they do not.
I submitted images from the set above to a very arty magazine, I just got word that they like the look, but they are not of the quality that they are looking for.  Such is life....do I resubmit them somewhere else?  Possibly. Or I post them on my FaceBook fan page, and then that is as far as they go.... these are decisions to be made.
I responded to a casting call on ModelMayhem from a wonderful photographer I had worked with a year, maybe a year and a half ago, Gracie Hagen.  She is bubbly and funny and very talented with an unusual eye( and has a great smooshy faced /exotic shorthair cat)  
She is doing a series called Illusions of the Body that has been written up in the Daily Mail  and  Huffington Post  as well as a host of other blogs and websites.  ( note, if you visit the links....they may not be suitable for work viewing, they are nude portraits)
Her concept is this. Create double images with the same model, lighting, post process, background.  One image is in a more conventional "pretty" or model like pose. One that shows off and is meant to be gorgeous.  The next image is sloughed, pulled in, hunched over.... very definitely not pretty.  What I took from it ( and I will not put words in her mouth, this is simply my take on it.  ) It speaks to how we present ourselves, and others perceptions.  If I stand or walk or look "thus"  I am pretty, If I stand or walk or look "this" then I am awkward, and not attractive.  But I am the same regardless.
She has used models, non models, male , female and ALL different body types.  She needed a redhead... and there we go.  I will be published , along with the 49 or so other people in her 8x10 book "Illusions of the Body" around May 1.
SO...Into one publication yesterday, and refused by another....that is this business.  Some you make,some you don't .